One Song

Hanging Valleys


Joel Frieders | March 10, 2017

Hit play on this song and then imagine me emerging, almost birthing, naked and lumpy, and fully coated with a thick transparent mucous, out of a large blooming flower.

As I stand, I shake my hips to and fro, whipping the clear, sticky goop from my thighs to the ground surrounding me.

I slowly take my hand and cup it around my opposite arm, and I wipe downwards, and more of the schmegma flings off of my arm onto the floor around me. Then I repeat with the other arm, while slowly, seductively, and sensually flinging the goop onto the already flung goop on the floor around me.

Just as you start to become even more aroused, I make eye contact with you and ask "do you want fries with THIS?" and thrust my pelvis in your general direction. 

Then as you tuck yourself back into yourself, you notice the juice on the floor around me, it's somehow a legible script that states your motherfucking high school locker combination in a clear semen-like substance.

And you answer breathlessly "YES! YES I WANT FRIES WITH THAT!" and then the curtains close and you carry on with your life.

These were the thoughts I was thinking while listening to the gorgeously erotic Hanging Valleys track "Brother". AND THEN I GOT TO THERAPY EARLY!