Frank Ocean

When I ditched Chicago at 18 and moved out to California to chase my dream of playing guitar for a living, I had to get a job. I used an employment agency and found one with a work day of 4am to 2:30pm. It completely fucked me up. Not only did I spend the day lying to people on the phone while yawning, but I ended up getting my first full paycheck stolen by the BBB during a BBB raid where BBB men with coats that said BBB took my money. BBB bitches.

But during this brief time in my life, I met a few of my current best friends, and I also discovered what music can do to you when you're completely in the moment and you find yourself the star of your own music video. I don't mean a literal music video, but alot of the major events in my life remind me of certain music, just as certain music remines me of certain times in my life.

Frank Ocean's free album: nostalgia, ULTRA is exactly what the drives to work at 3:30am five days a week felt like. I was the only person on the planet awake. There was never any traffic. It always smelled like the ocean; the good ocean, not the acrid ocean. As I'd pass under bridges on the way into downtown Santa Barbara, street lights would be encased in a thick pillow of fog, as if every muthafucker that was now sleeping had just finished clam baking the muthafucker without me.

What's clam baking? You fucking tools outside of Chicago call it 'hot boxing'. Also, while we're on the topic of pot terminology: IT'S A fucking RUSH HOLE. Fuck YOUR CARB FOO!

So, Frank Ocean, yeah.

I'm perfectly addicted to this album in a way that I haven't been since I first discovered Solid Gold. Are they similar? Fuck no. Well, maybe. They're both sensual and chill, or as I just made up, chillsual.

Frank Ocean has this fucking annoyingly keen ability to throw you off with hilarious, drug addled and sexually charged lyrics, and then bum rush yer brain with visions of situations you couldn't imagine yourself experiencing. The album is a mind-Fuck. All over the place in one respect, but a perfect introduction for me to a guy I know nothing about.

There's a line in the song "there will be tears"

'hide my face, hide my face.
can't let them see me cry, 
cause these boys ain't have no fathers neither
and they weren't cryin
my friend said it wasn't so bad,
you can't miss what you ain't have,
well I can. 
I'm saaaaaad 
and there will be tears.'

I'm REALLY not a guy to get hung up on lyrics for ANYTHING, I mean, I made out with a chick's mom during Schindler's List (WHAT? I READ THE BOOK!).

But this fucking guy took me from laughing and dancing to staring out my window like I just found out I ran over a box of puppies. PUPPIES! I KILLED A WHOLE BOX OF PUPPIES! Fuck YOU FRANK OCEAN! OH THE HUMANITY!

I love 90% of this album, and i find myself even loving the track where he sings over 'Hotel California' about America's fucked up relationship with marital relationships. I still can't believe this is an OFWGKTA affiliate, but I don't care. Yet I kind of get the relationship.

If I were to describe this album in one sentence with seven words it would be:

Comfortable, repeatable, sexy, sad, smooth and tangerine.

I just warshed my hands with tangerine handsoaps. Mmmmmmmmm, smells like Frank Ocean.

Go download this album for free from the internet, anywhere.