Phox

Lovefool (On The House)

Joel Frieders | August 6, 2015

Fuck this band.

Sure, they swoon me, make me sway, they commonly stop by my house to use the restroom (I call it a water closet), and they'll never hold full time jobs that involve timecards, but I'm telling you, they're all assholes. How do I know that Phox is full of assholes?

Phox is so full of assholes they once rented an RV for a tour and they returned it with BOTH the gas tank full AND the floors vacuumed! I mean, what the fuck is the point of being a rock band if you can't leave some crumbs or skip out on some gas action once in a while? STOP BEING SO FINANCIALLY AND SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE!

Phox is so full of assholes they commonly refer to each other as "friend" because if they aren't looking at each other when the other is talking, all of their voices sound like Monica's. They're all soft spoken, extremely limber, and they dabble in witchcraft (not black magic tho, that shit's played out).

Phox is so full of assholes, they once lost a band member and instead of finding a new band member, THEY ALL JUST SWITCHED UP INSTRUMENTS AND WORE MORE PASTEL COLORED CLOTHING.

Fuck this band of assholes.

Love "Lovefoo", but fuck this band.

Love,

Dad

P.S. Zakkkk looks like he's been lifting. SWOON