Welcome back to Trending Topics, our weekly recap of all things stupid, this week we discuss Madonna, Webb Simpson, Paul McCartney, Mike Tyson and more.
As always we are joined by noted celebritologist and Ninja Tunes recording artist Blockhead.
You can order his new album Interludes After Midnight, here.
Madonna has a ridiculous show rider and the internet goes nuts. Other things the internet goes nuts over because for some reason computers make people lose the ability to act rational are: Cheetos, Lacoste shirts and white women.
In a shocking turn of events,this delusional crypt keeper of a yoga studio is being ridiculous. Her show rider is now even remotely shocking to me. I'm surprised it didn't involved a virgin sacrifice follow by a colonic.
I thought he was a new character on The Simpsons, turns out he won some golf tournament. Would have been cooler if he was on The Simpsons.
Since I'm under 50 and from a city, I don't watch golf. But "Webb" is a pretty cool name. Seems fitting in the internet age. Though, without looking, I'mma guess this guy is some Andy haired old cracker who doesn't even know what e-mail is.
Turns 70 this week and not a grey hair to be found. It must be a great joy to live in denile.
Take heed Sheryl Crow. this is what you will look like in 25 years.
Spike Lee and Mike Tyson are teaming up to bring his story to Broadway. Honestly, I would watch Mike Tyson fold laundry. I find him endlessly interesting. If you haven't seen his documentary yet I suggest you do, he might be the most self aware human being alive. I AM NOT JOKING ABOUT THAT! SERIOUSLY!
He's gonna be on Broadway? I'll assume this is just taken out of context and it has nothing to do with plays or musicals and that he's going to the McDonalds on 72nd street. He'd fit in perfect there.
Here is how bad it is for Dale these days, a shitty electronic band that coopted his name is more popular than he is.
Golf and NASCAR! It's a big week for white people with shitty taste in sports.
The Burmese opposition leader accepts his nobel peace prize 2 decades after it was awarded and in related things that were relevant 2 decades ago, Bono showed up.
Obviously, I had to Google this. I typed in the name and Google responded with a simple "Eh…never mind"
Is it just me or has John McCain turned into Hank Hill's father from King of the Hill?
This old tyrannosaurus Rex armed creep needs to fall back. You lost, bro. Throwing shots at the throne now only makes you look like a bigger loser. Leave that up to the rubber faced Mormon with all the money.
I have no idea who the Fuck this person is, but apparently she has pink hair and this is important to Americans. Despite this shit we are still cutting school funding. Way to build a better future bro!
Whenever a Disney star who whored out for a bit does anything, it's news. Sure, she's been to rehab and did a soft core porn video while high but the big news this week? She's got pink hair. Stop the presses dewd.
John Edwards mistress came out and ratted about the other mistresses, my hope is that drives John Edwards joins dipset and rep the Stop Snitching movement. Then this story would truly be a perfect storm of the shittiest people and dumbest things of the past 10 years.
John Edwards is a relentless sex addict, huh? I'm looking forward to the porn movies his cheating ways spawns. Whatever they do, I want his character to be known as "John Headwards".
I hated him until he joined the Jets and then I grew to love that little sour faced fucker. Good luck you prick.
Like many before him, he went out with a sputter. If nothing else, he was a great RB and probably inspired children's names even more ridiculous than his own.