I have an internet friend that goes by Lioninmypocket on turntable.fm and he always plays great music that I've never heard. A couple of months ago he played this song by an artist called Kishi Bashi. I was instantly hooked on this dude with a name that sounds like he makes organic granola bars in his basement. I proceeded to check out his album, 151a, and loved it. It is one of the best albums I have heard this year; check out our review (listed below in related contents).
I needed to get a hold of Kishi Bashi (who goes by K Ishibashi) because I had the urge to ask him some deep and probing questions. However, I wasn't sure how this classically trained Asian violinist would respond to our line of vulgar questioning. I said Fuck it; I'm going to contact him anyway. When I easily got a hold of K, I quickly realized that I was a stereotyping shit-stained taint (say that 10 times fast). This was his response to my interview request:
How about you send me the e-mail questions and I'll just dig deep and insert the most fucked up $hit you've ever heard of (and dare you to print it)?
Game fucking on! It was apparent that K is one of the few who 'gets' what we are trying to do at Syffal. What is that? I'm not entirely sure.....but we definitely like to print some fucked up shit.
The challenge was set and the stakes were high. Knowing this, I had to invite Joel to the party. If there is anybody capable of provoking fucked up answers, it is Joel with his fucked up questions. Together we dug deep and tagged team the Fuck out of Ishibashi with a shit storm of sexual inuendos disguised as questions. K's answers were more fucked up than we ever imagined. And we love him for that.
Tom: Let’s get this straight. Your name is not Kishi Bashi; it is K. Ishibashi. What does the K stand for: Killer, Kankles, or Kevin?
K: It's actually an abbreviation for Kegle (my mother was an OB/GYN with a sense of humor)
Joel: I've trained my wife to perform kegels whenever someone near her hums or whistles. Have you considered a line of kefir? Kishi Kefir of the Bashi variety sounds pretty fucking exotic. I'd like to invest three spotify play payouts for an unemployed musician at .006 per play.
Kegle: Never even thought of it! But for that kind of hefty investment, I can promise at least a complementary cup of "product" in your mouth.
Tom: As long as it is strawberry flavored and deposited into a sterilized and BPA free plastic cup. Do you have a name for you genitals? It should be Bashi balls in my humble opinion. I like playing Boccie Balls yo.
Kegle: No, but if you press a certain part of my body, my left nut (exclusively) will rise. I call it the "Rise to Fame"
Joel: Ah, you own a humidifier. What the Fuck does 151a mean as an album title you vague shitfucking shitFuck?
Kegle: It can be read as "ichi-go-ichie-e" go wiki that shit!
Tom: Fuck Wikipedia bro. Using at least 3 sexual explicit words describe the sound of your music in haiku form:
Blowing night by night
Alley cunts in full bloom, yes!
Who needs a cum rag?
Joel: Asians aren't known for their poetriedz huh? Where do you find the strength to empower so many tight pantsed youths? Is the strength rooted in your criminally delicious brand of adorable?
Kegle: Deep within me there's a flower that's wilted. Every day I try water that flower in hopes that it will one day blossom again. It was hard at first sticking a hose down my throat day after day, but it's gotten easy over the years....
Tom: In addition to your talent of deep throating hoses, you are also extremely talented with the looping pedal. After 2 value meals at taco bell can you record me taking a shit and loop it into a lullaby?
Kegle: For 2 Taco Bell value meals, I will make a loop out of your first born child's intestines.
Joel: So you're actually Hmong? I will go hide my childrenz. I was curious about your eating habits, as the kashi brand is pretty well known for their scrumptious snackbars. Where were you on December 2005? The month bro bro.
Kegle: I was most likely on my honey moon with my first wife: my right hand.
Tom: On the track Bright Whites I hear the influences of Paul McCartney and Paul Simon being mashed together. Which one of these guys do you find more sexual attractive?
Kegle: How did you know that my favorite sexual fantasy would be Paul on Paul at Pauly Shores house with Paula Abdul riding a blow up doll that that resembles Phillip Seymour Hoffman in "Along Came Polly"?
Joel: Paul on Paul is me wrestling my confirmation sponsor. When you watch YouTube videos do you mute the commercials? You epic fucking dick.
Kegle: I don't, but those aggravating genre non-specific commercials on Spotify make me want to upgrade the Fuck out of them!
Tom: While writing these questions I’m also watching an episode of Man Vs. Wild. Create a hypothetical scenario where you’d be forced to squeeze and drink the juices out of elephant dung to combat dehydration.
Kegle: I dont think id be able to do that. I don't see how Id be able to stop fucking it!
Joel: Would you be offended if I told you I'm shitting in a moving rv right now? What if I told you the guy driving doesn't know I'm in here? What if I told you I'm lying and I'm watching Yo Gabba Gabba on mute and my kids went to bed hours ago?
Kegle: D: all of the above
Joel: Jenny McCarthy. Please tell me you're trained in CPR.
Kegle: I saw her once coming out of a limousine and she was pretty fucking hot. Great personality too (i could tell by the way she said "hi")
Tom: What was your favorite TV show or movie growing up?
Kegle: We had a Betamax and I remember wearing the shit out of Space Balls and Inner Space
Tom: Can you cover the theme song for our quickly growing sensation: Pop Cultures Collide
Tom: You are a Fuck face, but an adorable Fuck face. We will make your left nut rise anytime.
*Usually at the end of the interview I ask if the artists if they want to plug anything., but I forgot to ask K, so I'll do it for him.
A) Buy it 151a.....it is fucking glorious.
B) Go see him live. Here is a list of some upcoming shows.