JMelen - Checkmate

I have a roommate who learned how to play chess in prison. Dude is unbeatable. He bitches me like I’m a little kid. And I’m not that bad at chess! He’s the Bobby fucking Fisher of ex-cons.

That being said, if it isn’t a game based on the indecent amount of trivial knowledge I have after a lifetime of cable for parents, I suck at it. Ask me what beverage Michael Jackson was endorsing when the Jherri curl went boom. I got you. Ask me what honor an NBA player would be receiving if he was given the Maurice Podoloff Trophy. Done.

Don’t answer my texts after a few dates? Fuck, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.

Come over, make out with me, and then sleep on the couch? Fuck if I know.

Ask me to come over and then spend the whole time seemingly disinterested? Um, ok.

Freak out on me about some stupid joke I made about Tim and mouth rape? I’m stumped.

JMelen of 0886 on his new EP, Redwine is just as frustrated as I am with that shit.