People now ask me if I am married and/or have kids these days. My initial reaction to this question is often something along the lines of "brah, I just blew $200 on heavy metal records and spent last night drinking expensive craft beers while playing Doom", but I often opt for a significantly vaguer, more conservative reply. Regardless, this has made me come to realize that I am now a grown man.
Having successfully survived my adolescence without ending up rehab and with all limbs intact is quite an accomplishment. At times I will sit back, lukewarm slice of pizza in hand, and reminisce about my days of yore. A popular hypothetical question I often ponder is "if you could tell your childhood self anything, what would it be?"
WELL LEMME TELL YA!
1. Skateboards and playground equipment do not mix!
I was fourteen years of age and the summer before high school had just begun. I was out skateboarding around early dusk and the unsophisticated appeal of simple, flat pavement had proved to be intolerably tiresome for my session. Logically, I began to seek thrills elsewhere. The "ah-ha moment" occurred when I spotted a large...
