1. Know how to play music
This seems sarcastic, I'm sure, but this is number one for a reason. If your cousin just got protools and you started messing around while slightly intoxicated and you came up with a hook for a song with no verses and no real way of ending, don't rush off to Facebook and create an artist page just yet. It's important that you have actual music worth sharing before you start spending a shitload of time spreading it. I don't want to shit in your peanut buster parfait, but "your boy" telling you your "shit is fire son" is not a good enough reason to start calling yourself an artist and asking music blogs and other innocent humans to listen to your music bro.
2. Know how to record music, or know someone who does
This is pretty important, if not more important than number one, because sometimes horrible music can sound amazing if recorded by a studio magician. But once you have music worth recording, invest in having it sound awesome. That means either spending money to go into a studio or spending money and time in learning how to record everything yourself.
I will warn you that recording your album yourself and learning how to record yourself are two separate feats, so don't expect your debut album and your recording debut to be one in the same.
Speaking from experience, spend the time rehearsing the content of your album and then pay to have it professionally recorded. If you invest in your sound instead of a mic that costs three months rent that you'll only use once, the people listening to your album will appreciate it bro. Spending time wisely also means spending money wisely yo.
Also, if you pay someone else to record your album and it sucks ass, you can totes blame the studio/producer and then spend the rest of your life using that as an excuse as to why you never "blew up". You should plan your out in case someone calls you on being a shitty musician and not following number 1 above.
3. Know how to tag & number your tunes
I can't fucking stand receiving music that isn't properly tagged. It's the bane of my existence as an asshole music blog owner. I've spent hours explaining the process to young and eager musicians, and I've spent even more hours talking shit to PR reps who get paid for routinely sending hundreds of music blogs untagged music. The process isn't fucking difficult, it just takes a conscious effort bro. Either you have tagged music, or you're a fucking lazy asshole.
But look at this one like this: if you were in school and you studied for a test for weeks and finally took the motherfucker and you think you aced the shit and when it comes time to get feedback from the teacher you don't get a test handed back to see your grade, wouldn't you be pissed? Where's my grade? OH BUT BRO. YOU DIDN'T PUT YOUR NAME ON THE TEST. YOU FAIL.
That's not tagging your music you lazy asshole. Put your name on your music or don't complain when no one you don't know personally gives you any feedback.
As far as numbering goes, utilizing a tagging software or iTunes to number your tracks is super fucking easy, just remember single digits are two digits long. 1 isn't 1 bro, it's 01. 9 isn't 9 bro, it's 09. Why? Because in a single digit world the song that comes after 1 is 10 motherfucker. So if you are a dickface and WANT people to listen to your music out of order, be the dickface and number 1, 2, 3...9, 10, 11. But don't be upset when I say "dude the second song on your album is so slow and shitty I couldn't listen to the rest of it, so I deleted it and moved on" you dickface.
4. Know where to host your tunes
While I prefer bandcamp to soundcloud (because I can download the whole album at one time and/or pay you for it), there's no reason not to use both simultaneously. Why use one over the other if they both serve different, albeit important, functions? Bandcamp is for sales and soundcloud is for plays, reposts and embedding. We learned a while back that soundcloud plays are like gold for certain companies, so there are a large number of aggregators, websites, and apps that only look at a band's soundcloud feed to determine a track's popularity.
If I were you I'd sign up for both, uploading the huge fucking wav files up to bandcamp and following their tagging instructions, and then downloading the high quality MP3s from your own bandcamp and uploading THOSE files to soundcloud. That way, not only are your tracks properly fucking tagged (see number 3 bro), but they're in a high quality format that can play on any device AND they aren't fucking 78MB wav files that no one needs. Fuck wav files bro. Bloggers who need wav files are assholes.
We get asked a lot about using youtube to host music, and while I can't say anything bad about doing that because the shit works, I would rate uploading your music to youtube as third on the list of things to do after setting up a bandcamper and a soundcloud.
Oh, and take your fucking reverbnation spambot widget shits and shove them up your fucking ass bro. If you've ever used ad blocker pro on any browser and visited a reverbnation site, you'll know what I'm talking about, but if you haven't, well, comma, fuck reverbnation. HAWRD.
5. Know how to ask people to listen to your tunes
If you normally speak l33t, speak l33t bro, do you boo. But don't be surprised if when you tYpE liK3 th15 in an email to a music blog asking to have your music covered by said blog the music never gets heard.
Same with a 786 word biography that doesn't contain any links to any music. Biographies are for people who care about your music already. I don't care about your music bro.
Here's a quick way to cover every base and not sound like a fucking tool:
Every correspondence to any stranger who you want to have listen to your music should be quick, and include everything. Always include the following: artist name, bandcamp/soundcloud page, social media links and important dates. If you're releasing an album in a month, mention that and include a link for what you're asking to be heard. If you have a music video to share, include the link. If you're crowdfunding your new album, eat all of the shit and go somewhere else.
Copying and pasting the email you sent to pitchfork is a quick way of getting your email deleted. That's not because we're pretentious, it's because we're sensitive bros. SYFFAL might have a handy dandy form for you to fill out to give us exactly what we would need to peep your deliciousness, but sometimes you have to cold call some bloggers to get your shit out without having to pay a PR rep, so be brief, include the necessary links, and maybe follow up in a few weeks (from the initially sent email works really well bro).
Other than that, not having music that sucks balls is the only step on here really worth listening to if you're smarter than everyone else.
Shitty music is shitty. Don't be shitty bro. Think of the children.