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Isaiah Toothtaker - Illuminati Thug Mafia - Album Review

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By: Joel Frieders
Isaiah toothtaker, illuminati thug mafia, machina muerte, album review, hip hop
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DOWNLOAD: Isaiah Toothtaker feat. Mestizo: Self Control

I'm a sensible guy (sometimes). I (sometimes) know when to shut the Fuck up. I know when to keep shit to myself (sometimes).

Thankfully me keeping shit to myself would only mean I would have to avoid telling people I'm a fucking huuuuuuge fucking fan of Isaiah Toothtaker. Even if I wasn't in the cheering section, I doubt I'd publicly step up on the grandstand of the jeerers. Like I said, a sensible vato.

Isaiah Toothtaker has fascinated me since I saw a picture of my friend Alex hanging around a stereotypically sketched cholo with a neck tattoo and a little stubby intimidating cigar. Here is this guy not even trying, and he's running a gang of talented, and subsequently intimidating muthafuckers on a record label with perhaps the best name and logo in the history of record labels.

Machina Muerte is not only the home of one of my favorite rappers, Mestizo, and one of my favorite and insanely brutally honest friends from Chicago, RAPEWOLF, but it is annoyingly dominating in a scene dripping with style over substance. Fortunately none of these muthafuckers care to put an act before skill.

Just to set this review off like a maltov cocktail thrown through the window of a pet shop that spells shop with an extra p and an e (shoppe bruh), the track Self Control is the most addicting beat I've heard in fucking years. That crisp Pink Floyd delay looped like a robot raping an MPC and that high pitched "oh ah oh ah" just fucking makes me want to fucking stab a muthafucker in the throat and bust a running man in the pile of entrails. Mestizo throws his voice like a pair of fists already bloody from the street fight, and Isaiah Toothtaker's "I already knocked you out" spit is fucking death as the cherry on the top of the pile of flesh we've already kicked around.

And while that track might be my favorite to imagine being performed live, I have seriously woken up in a cold sweat to the creepy "I'm in a horror movie" steeze of Unheard/Unseen. Cadalack Ron, while not someone I'm fully up on, is a creepy ginger character I'm sure just from the tone of his voice alone. Isaiah Toothtaker is consistently inviting the right muthafuckers on the right tracks throughout this whole fucking album.

The guest spots from MURS put that recently-undredded muthafucker on a whole new level for me. The guy who used to just ooze sunshine is pissed off and just slammed his plate of pasta salad and carnitas on the ground bruh. MURS IS PISSED BRUH. I never thought I'd say that shit bruh!

In the end, Isaiah Toothtaker could've done this album on his own and still fucking killed it. I love it. I fucking adore the feeling I have when my ears are introduced to someone my eyes are so concerned with already. Dude has a knife behind his back and instead of threatening people with it, he's writing raps in his rap slab of cedar with a stab stab on meter.

If I ever meet this dude, I swear to fucking RAPEWOLF I'm gonna hug his mean ass and when I let go and feel either the warm blood dripping from him stabbing me, or nothing because he didn't, I'm going to howl.

P.S. WHO THE Fuck IS SERPDOT? I want to be besties with that prick ASAP.

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