Advina - Fortune Teller

By: Joel Frieders

I've been completely avoiding investigating what I'm going to listen to before starting the downloads lately. All of these amazing fucking musicians sending in music from all the Fuck over the planet, I think I needed a break from attempting to sift. There comes a time when a genre means nothing, at least when we're talking what's going to fucking make me moist and what I'm just going to flick past. So if anything at any given time can fucking inspire me, whether it's electronic or acoustic, or bedroom studio or actual studio produced, rock or bluegrass, I think I owe it to the fact that there's energy coming at us to kind of try it all out for myself.

Granted, I'm not going to fucking lie, I've been forwarding all of the hip hop over to Brandon and Emp. But everything else at least touches my ears at least once. Sometimes I'm moved to listen again, and sometimes I have to fucking pull over to dig into my phone to see if something was sent to us or recommended to me by one of our friends or I dug for it myself.

I pulled over for this fucking band.

Advina submitted their album Fortune Teller to syffal at some point in the recent future, and I accidentally stumbled onto it completely out of my normal method of listening to everything. If I'm being honest, and I am you shitneck, I restarted my phone double tapped the home button and hit play, and because I didn't have one of my trademark dated playlists cued up anymore, it played the first artist name in the fucking pile.

I assumed because of the first 69 seconds, and the looks of the album cover, that I was embarking on a trip with a chillwave artist. I mean seriously, landscape pictures and geometrical patterns? Turquoise bro?

Advina gently disarms you and then the fucking phallus shaped gauntlet drops and people are fucking standing everywhere with their hands in the air, their eyes shut, slowly swaying back and forth, but oh yeah, they're emotionally singing a wordless mantra of "whoaaaaa" that makes your fucking hair stand up on the back of your neck. Advina take the listener and completely throws them against the wall with an immediate kick in the throat from a boot called post rock, and vocals that remind me of a Snow Patrol with larger tattooed testicles meets a Thirty Seconds To Mars with baggier jeans.

There's no arguing the intensity, but it isn't the intensity where you want to punch shit. Rather it's the intensity where your eyes focus a bit harder, your jaw clenches just a bit more, your grip tenses enough to pop fucking veins, and you can fucking see everything for what it fucking is. Your mind doesn't just go into overdrive, it goes into 4D, and you're all of a sudden aware of anything, everything and nothing in particular.

Advina tickle me in more than a few areas in reference to their sound. The drummer has incredible restraint, but on few scattered and brief moments, the fucking dude just bucks fucking shots (seriously listen to I Ended Up Here On My Own @ 2:30-3:10 - holy Fuck). The lead vocals are incredibly raw and innocent, sounding more like a dude with an issue than a dude with something to prove, and when they're paired with the backing vocal at a more conversational pitch, they're fucking endearing to the point of resentment. The consistent addition of crowd vocals is something that cusped me dangletwins right from the word "whoaaa", as there is nothing more epic and inspiring than a crowd of (seemingly) thousands with their mouths and arms shouting up towards the fucking sky. The guitars are subtly beautiful and intentionally patient, but the finesse displayed in regards to their effects is fucking disgusting, and I seriously doubt if I've heard better decisions in the recent past.

Advina retain this trait of sounding familiar as Fuck, and yet I've been consistently starting the 6 track Fortune Teller EP over for further evidence that they're actually new on my radar.

I don't really know what else to say besides I fucking love this band. And my arms hurt from holding them above my head and my knees hurt from driving with them for the past few hours as I drove circles around my house getting the rest of my Advina fix.

Band is fucking tits ass bewbs bro.